Computer Gender [[
via my good programmer~friend Marcia Murphy
Top 10 Reasons Why Computers Must Be Male
- : They have
a lot of data, but are still clueless.
- : They are
supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time
they are the problem.
- : As soon
as you commit to one you realize that, if you had waited
a little longer, you could have got a better model.
- : They're
heavily dependent on external tools and equipment.
- : They
periodically cut you off right when you think you've
established a network connection.
- : They'll
usually do what you ask them to do, but they won't do
more than they have to, and they won't think of it on
their own.
- : They're
typically obsolete within five years and need to be
traded in for a new model. Some users, however, feel
they've already invested so much in the dern machine that
they're content to remain with an underpowered system.
- : In order
to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
- : They get
hot when you turn them on.
- : Big power
surges knock them out for the rest of the night.
Top 5 Reasons Why Computers Must Be Female
- : No one
but their Creator understands their internal logic.
- : Even the
smallest mistakes are immediately committed to long-term
memory for later retrieval.
- : The
native language they use to communicate with other
computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
- : The
message "Bad command or filename" is about as
informative as "If you don't know why I'm mad at
you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you."
- : As soon
as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself
spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
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